We conducted an experiment using Bing‘s auto-complete feature to provide a window into online searches of each U.S. state. We could have used Google for this experiment, but we used Bing as our search engine because we’re pioneers who swim against the tide.
For our search, we simply entered in the state name followed by “is.” We used the first declarative statement auto-complete provided, and discarded anything in the form of a question. What we discovered is there are large pockets of racists, northern states like to praise themselves, Texas is emo, nobody likes California or New York, and Hawaii is filled with liars. Please note these search results in no way reflect the views or beliefs of Estately or it’s employees.
Alabama is racist
How racist is it? Alabama is so racist there are over 9 million search results for “Alabama is racist.”
Alaska is cold
If you think that statement is pointing out the obvious you should see the #4 result—”Alaska is not an island.”
Arizona is a racist state
If it’s any consolation to Arizona, 50 percent of all U.S. States that begin with the letter “A” have “racist” in their title.
Arkansas is a $#!*hole
Arkansas was the only state featuring a swearword as the top search result. That’s not very nice, America.
California is the worst state
California can take solace in knowing they’re still in the top 50.
Colorado is legal
Colorado recently legalized recreational marijuana and it appears to already be reducing the cognitive function of stoners performing online searches.
Connecticut is anti gun
Except for all the gun manufacturers.
Delaware is workers comp exclusive remedy
Workers compensation laws aren’t as flashy as legalized marijuana, but still very important to the people of Delaware.
District of Columbia is a foreign corporation
It’s shocking to hear Washington, DC is a foreign corporation, but which one? Do you think it’s Mazda?
Florida is for nurses
Florida has not been awash in great press of late, so this is truly something for all Floridians to celebrate… …never mind.
Georgia is a right to work state
Hawaii is no paradise
The internet is filled with liars telling lies.
Idaho is the most corrupt state
According to the Center for Public Integrity, when it comes to corruption Idaho scores a D—. That’s terrible, but not nearly as bad as those states with F grades: Georgia, Maine, Michigan, South Carolina, South Dakota, Virginia, and Wyoming.
Illinois is broke
Hard to believe the state that gave America Rod Blagojevich doesn’t have it’s financial house in order. C’mon, Illinois! Actually, this one’s kind of economic pickle.
Indiana is the worst state
There can only be one “worst state” so Indiana’s going to have to fight California to determine which one is truly the dregs of American states. Hoosiers vs. Hollywood has pay-per-view gold written all over it.
Iowa is boring Yahoo
Yes, a lot of people have asked the question, “Is Iowa boring?” And yes, that question has largely been answered with an affirmative. However, it’s doubtful any of these nay-sayers ever experienced the excitement of being lost in a corn maze.
Kansas is being poisoned
Is that true? Is Kansas really being poisoned? Someone should really get to the bottom of this.
Kentucky is a state Family Guy
“Kentucky Is a State” is a song sung by Peter Griffin in the animated TV show Family Guy. It is not complimentary of the good people of Kentucky.
Louisiana is a weird state
Really? Name one thing that’s weird about Louisiana. Oh, there are hundreds of weird things about Louisiana.
Maine is beautiful
Not only that, but Maine also has a really good personality and it’s the #1 U.S. State for Cat Lovers.
Maryland is a southern state
Maryland does indeed reside below the Mason-Dixon Line. In fact, if the south was a pair of mom jeans, Maryland would be the frumpy elastic waistband.
Massachusetts is a coffin
Before you go getting all spooked out about Massachusetts you should know that “Massachusetts Is A Coffin” is a 31-track album featuring a compilation of some of the “best hardcore bands in Massachusetts.”
Michigan is vendor
Apparently everyone in Michigan wants to be a food vendor, a craft vendor, or learn how to break into a vending machine.
Minnesota is more corrupt than acknowledged
Even Minnesota’s online search queries are written in a really passive voice.
Mississippi is racist
Right now there’s a racist in Mississippi who’s relieved to discover it wasn’t “Mississippi is obese” or “Mississippi is illiterate.”
Missouri is awesome
This is true, but you probably won’t know how awesome until you watch this video.
Montana is for badasses
If you’re not a badass and you’re driving across Montana it’s going to be 551 miles without a bathroom break.
Nebraska is for lovers t-shirt
There’s not a lot going on in Nebraska so there’s little to distract two lovers from the act of lovemaking. The “Nebraska Is For Lovers” cotton T-shirt even doubles as lingerie in Nebraska.
Nevada is the most mountainous state
With 172 mountain peaks over 2,000 feet, Nevada is technically the most mountainous in the country.
New Hampshire is awesome
Great, now Vermont is going to get all insecure and need a pep talk. It’s just such a needy state ever since Maine called it fat at that party.
New Jersey is ilanlari
“Ilanlari” is a Turkish word that means “ads.” So New Jersey is for ads. Not “Jersey Shore” or “corruption” or or “mafia stereotypes” or “pollution.” That distant sound of clapping you hear is the whole state of New Jersey simultaneously high-fiving.
New Mexico is horrible
Looks like Arizona’s been up late slandering it’s neighbor online again. Let it go, Arizona.
New York is a dump
Technically, Staten Island was a dump—literally a landfill—but the whole state?
North Carolina is my home
When people from South Carolina sneak across the border to start new lives in North Carolina, they do whatever it takes to blend in, include repeating the mantra “North Carolina is my home” over and over until they believe it.
North Dakota is not a state
Not a state? Look, if America had to give Canada one state in exchange for taking back Justin Bieber it would probably be North Dakota, but until that day North Dakota remains part of America.
Ohio is for lovers
For Nebraska lovers looking to spice things up, how about a romantic trip to Cleveland?
Oklahoma is suing the Obama administration
Of course it is.
Oregon is faster Nike
Oregon isn’t faster because it’s home to Nike’s headquarters. Oregon appears faster because they’re so jittery from all the coffee.
Pennsylvania is a nice place to visit
If you grow tired of all the public displays of affection by the lovers in Ohio, consider a trip to Pennsylvania, which is a very nice place to visit, but doesn’t exactly put people in the mood.
Rhode Island is famous for you
It sounds like a desperate marketing campaign by the state’s tourism board, but it’s actually the name of a song written by Howard Dietz.
South Carolina is too small to be a republic
This is just half the quote. The whole quote is, “South Carolina is too small to be a republic and too large to be an insane asylum.”
South Dakota is K2 illegal
Neighboring Iowa banned K2, a brand of “incense” that’s the chemical twin of marijuana,. This has caused great concern amongst the people of South Dakota that use it to get high.
Tennessee is racist
Not the title Tennessee was hoping for. However, Tennessee can take solace in knowing that the first Google auto-complete is “Tennessee is the worst state.”
Texas is the reason
Utah is on track to end homelessness
Ever the Boy Scout, while other states are busy with self-loathing and welcoming lovers, the dutiful state of Utah is ending homelessness.
Vermont is for lovers too
First Vermont geographically piggybacks on New Hampshire, and then it piles on Virginia’s lovers campaign. Until Vermont learns to be itself, and stop copying other states, it will never happy.
Virginia is for lovers 14k
It’s a wonder anyone in Virginia has the energy to run a 14-kilometer race considering all the loving that’s going on.
Washington State is the best
Apparently, the confidence of Seattle Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman is contagious and giving Washington State some serious swagger. However, the next three results on the list were 1—Awesome, 2—Boring, and 3—Depressing. So perhaps the manic mood in this grey state is a pendulum swinging from exuberant to depressed.
West Virginia is for lovers
No it’s not.
Wisconsin is awesome
Have you ever noticed when a person from Wisconsin has a few too many drinks they proceed to brag about Wisconsin? That’s annoying, but Wisconsin is actually very awesome. In fact, here are 29 Reasons You Should Live In Wisconsin.
Wyoming is the cowboy state
But which state is the rhinestone cowboy state?
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